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ZOMBIE TEST SUBJECTS 

"In each of three, 7.62 m x 7.62 m experimental rooms, ten inactive, bare zombies were each secured in the right lateral recumbent position on a stainless steel examining table and randomly distributed with other zombies throughout the room… Zombies were maintained satiated and inactive by 5.0 mEq/hr continuous intravenous provision of pureed bovine-human meal (34.5% bovine plasma, 33.5% bovine red blood cells, and 32.0% whole-body human composite) and cleaned daily to prevent the accumulation of leaking meal and other waste.  Before high rates of consumption and pupation in zombie flesh became potentially limiting to Danaus plexippus, additional zombies were added, as necessary, to maintain available food and substrate.  Transfer of D. plexippus larvae from a used to an unused zombie was allowed by “spooning” or nestling the ventral surface of an unused zombie, also in the right lateral recumbent position, tightly against the dorsal surface of the used zombie and draping the left arm of the unused zombie over the shoulder of the used zombie to provide stability as well as maximum contact for larval transfer."

From Pages 5-6 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research

ZOMBIE ONCOLOGY

"Infection with ZOMBI encephalitis... may indicate increased five-year survival in Stage IV Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer patients. With advances in the treatment and prognosis of ZOMBI encephalitis, some consideration may be given to utilizing voluntary ZOMBI encephalitis infection to prolong life for patients diagnosed with Stage IV Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer."

From Page 152 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research

​​ZOMBIE COMMUNICATION

"Twenty-eight different vocalization types were identified… the most frequently tallied being the grunt, mumble, sigh, moan, grumble, purr, and sniff vocalizations."

From Page 162 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research

ZOMBIE ENTRAILS

"Reduced contents in the colon of ZOMBI encephalitis-positive subjects may be explained by diet, which with moderate to advanced disease, is comprised almost exclusively of easily digestible, animal-derived foods."

From Page 82 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research

ZOMBIE PARASITES

"I watched a swarm of insects of all sizes swirling above and crawling and perching upon what I first thought was a heap of ground.  When I moved closer and the insects startled and cleared, I saw the body beneath.  A unique suite of organisms twisted and turned in the languid flesh, no maggots or dermestids but colorful caterpillars, patrolling lady beetle larvae, and gyrating pupae positioning for emergence, some popping through the skin like heated corn kernels.  – Avery Camshronach Delgado, 1969"

From Page 2 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research

NEONATAL ZOMBIES

"Females infected with ZOMBI encephalitis gave birth to symptomatic “living” babies, regardless of the symptomatic or asymptomatic status of the mother.  Newborns presented with five of the six signs and symptoms required for a diagnosis of advanced disease:  loss of sensitivity to light touch, decomposition and sloughing of greater than 11% of the dermal stratum papillare, decomposition and sloughing of the dermal stratum reticulare, the inability to deny a desire to consume human flesh, as well as the consumption of human flesh, as all of these newborns consumed part of the uterus before delivery and/or the umbilical cord, placenta, and/or amniotic sac before or during delivery and continued behaving as aggressive bite hazards to all handlers post-delivery."

From Pages 121-122 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research

ZOMBIE CONTROL

"Zombies were rendered inactive via a 8.5 mEq/hr continuous intravenous provision of pureed bovine-human meal (45.0% bovine plasma, 37.5% bovine red blood cells, 17.5% whole-body human composite)."             

From Page 4 in the Bulletin of ZOMBIE Research